Free Falling

30 01 2012

I jumped out of an airplane yesterday. Focusing too much on it, even now with my butt firmly planted in this chair at Starbucks, makes my heart beat quicken.

I knew that if I didn’t jump first, I wouldn’t do it. Watching and anticipating would only allow for the dread to build up and paralyze me. While I began my descent into anxiety (in preparation from my descent from an airplane), Wil called over, “Michael, do you want to go first?” Yes.

Surprisingly, there wasn’t a lot of training. The tandem instructors pulled Wil and I aside, strapped us into the harnesses, and walked us to the plane. “So we’ll cover what you need to do in the plane, and I’ll explain the landing on our way down.” Good. No need to think about this too much.

The plane was a single prop Cessna.- room for two skydivers, two tandem instructors, and a pilot. Cramped inside, the tiny plane began to go down the runway. Oddly enough as the wheels lifted off the ground, I felt a calm come over me. Like any of the other flights I’ve been on, once we takeoff, there’s nothing I can really do. I was committed.

The instructor, Justin, walked me through the position I needed to get in once we left the plane. That was it. As we climbed up and up to our goal of 10,000 feet, I began to shake again. Wil looked at me and gave a sarcastic toothy smile and a thumbs up. About that time, my instructor started saying something to the pilot. Quick exchanges were made and he unclipped me from the harness, pushing me towards Wil and saying he needed to look at something. The heater in the plane was on and Justin was leaning against it. When he removed his hand from the back of the parachute, there was melted glue all over it. Shit was melting. Panic swelled in me. Wide-eyed I looked at the floor, then up, then at Wil, then at my instructor. “Dude, it’s fine, we’ll be ok.”

After a few minutes pass, Justin hooks me back up. “How about a few skydiving jokes before we go?” What the hell – hit me. The jokes, I assumed, were to calm my nerves, but there’s only so much you can do to distract you from the fact that you’re about to jump out of an airplane and free fall at 120mph.

The time had finally come. Justin opened the door and the roar of wind made the loud Cessna even louder. Wil gave another sign of encouragement and a skeptical glance. I knew in the back of his mind he figured this would be the part where I said ‘hell no’ to the whole thing. Justin put his feet out of the plane, I followed suit. 1, 2, 3. We were falling.

It all happened very quickly. Tumbling downward, there was no sense of direction. Just a rush of air. My eyes open I see the plane veer away from us. It was an image burned into my mind. Seeing a plane from the perspective was almost haunting. It was almost like missing a bus. You see it take off down the street without you and in your head you scream, “Wait for me!” The plane was not going to wait – and the option of jumping back inside James Bond style was not really an option.

I arched my back, lifted my head up, and kicked my feet backwards (the position they told us to get into). As soon as I did that the twirling leveled off. Justin made some maneuvers that spun us around like a top or a awkward cartwheel. There was some element of control, despite the fact that we were freefalling to the ground.

45 seconds is a long time. A long ass time. It’s enough time to process what’s going on, stick your arms out, realize what’s going on, and to think “holy shit, holy shit, holy shit” about 87 times.

Justin pulled the cord, and the mangled, melted, malfunctioning parachute that I signed pages and pages of waivers consenting to the fact that it might not work, I might not survive, I might not make it home, unfurled. With a jolt, we stopped falling and began to coast slowly to the ground.

Elements of control came with the slower descent as well. I drove a little bit – pulling the handles to the left and right. Then allllll the way to the right, which sent us into this quick spiral and fast fall to the ground again. Positive that I had sealed our fate again, I said “that’s enough, I’m done doing that,” and gave the handles back to Justin (after again assuring him that I’m not going to puke). About that time I see Wil’s parachute open up.

We landed on our butts at a slower pace than it felt. The ground was soft and wet and amazing under my ass. I survived, I always knew I would. The adrenaline coursed through my veins and I felt an amazing high. I tempted death, in a controlled environment, sort of. I didn’t do anything except fall out of an airplane.

Would I do it again? Probably not. I’m not a thrill seeker. I can check the box that I experienced jumping from an airplane, but I think I prefer riding in them and drinking to jumping out. Wil and I discussed that maybe, MAYBE, if an opportunity came up where we could do it someplace really unique like the Alps or into some famous canyon or something that the option could be reconsidered.

Skydive Sacramento gets five-stars. The guys there were professional and fun. They put up with our large group and got 7 out of 7 first time divers back to the ground safely. We got our stuff and left to drive back to Palo Alto (and eventually back into SF for me).

At we made our way home, the girl driving wasn’t looking and the car ahead of us hit their brakes. I made that noise that all mom’s make when their kids are new drivers. Wil looked over and said, “Really? That scared you? You just jumped out of an airplane.” Touché.





Baggage.

19 01 2012

For work, I travel a lot. Last year I was gone almost very other week. 9 countries, heaps of cities, tons of miles. People who travel a majority of their time learn the tricks – how to get through security without any problems, which airports have the best restaurants, who to schmooze to get upgraded…and they also have their ‘must have’ items they bring with them.

I accumulated a lot of stuff over the past year. Tomorrow I leave for the first work trip of the year – the first of 18 scheduled ones so far (and I manage to squeeze in some personal trips and work tacks on another couple when I am too idle in Austin). Who am I kidding, I love every minute of it and would travel nonstop if I could.

On my last flight (coming home from Boston after celebrating New Years there) I watched ‘Up in the Air.’ I loved it and completely related to the main character…and also turned the movie off 3/4 of the way through. (I know how that shit ends and I liked feeling good about relating to Georgey…didn’t care to share in his doom). Oh, spoiler alert: It ends on a kind of depressing note, except for his weird sister, but I digress.

So, on all my trips last year, I brought this backpack. Throughout the year my bag got heavier and heavier. I could go off on a metaphor about how that represents my life and I’m hauling all of this extra weight…….oh my god, this IS like ‘Up in the Air…’ I’ll stop. Promise.

The point of this entry though is to explain what I did tonight. I emptied out my backpack completely. A new year, a fresh start. Annnd I just wanted to see what kind of shit was in there.

So here it is, everything I pulled out of my magic bag after 12 months of nonstop travel:

  1. laptop
  2. iPad
  3. journal
  4. busted iPhone
  5. bag of cough drops
  6. laser pointer and slide advancer
  7. old name badge from Cincinnati
  8. iPhone charger
  9. 2 camera lens covers
  10. RayBans
  11. alligator bracelet from Australia
  12. woven bracelet
  13. business cards
  14. hand sanitizer
  15. Afrin
  16. eye drops
  17. 100cal bag of almonds
  18. apple
  19. several pens
  20. 5 boarding passes
  21. rubber bands and clips
  22. 2 thumb drives
  23. Burts chap stick
  24. allergy medicine
  25. mouse
  26. green sharpie
  27. NYC metro card
  28. taxi cab receipt
  29. tissues
  30. currency from 3 different countries
  31. proof for an agenda concept




back to it

16 01 2012

A lot has happened since I last wrote in here. 

Friendships new and old, lost and forged. Relationships burned. Kicked in doors. Revolutions in career, in family, in self.

Two-thousand twelve. A year that many have feared, speculated, doubted, waited – a year that is associated with endings, and yet, so far, this year has been about rebirth for myself. A personal Renaissance.

This post isn’t about a particular topic. It’s about starting something anew. Just get something out there. I’ve tried in the past to define this blog as a medium to track the course of progress, yet in maticulously plotting my life around what I should do to present to the world, I found myself stuck in a gridlock. Nothing created. 

I truly hope to turn that around this year. There is already plenty of fodder – a horrible relationship morphing into a book, being abandoned in a foreign country by one of my closets friends, a job that keeps me traveling around the world 75% of the year…plenty of things to comment on.

So whether it is travel or work or dreams or musical theater or boys – I plan on keeping up here. Resolutions abound. I feel like 2012 will be a lot like 2008. I made some promises to myself and I religiously kept up with them. I want these things.

Here we go. 

 








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